Things

1. Here's what I know about dating: It's the most confusing, stressful, drink-inducing thing ever.

Except for maybe buying a house.

Except buying a house, in my own experience anyway, turned out better.

And I say that even though I pay through the nose for a house that someone else lives in while I sleep in my parents' guest bedroom.

1a. I think my next tattoo will be "He's just not that into you."

Right across the back of my hand, so I can always see it.

1b. Recent discussion with a lovely lady friend: How dating brings out every insecurity you've ever had, regardless of how wonderful and beautiful and smart and charming you might be and how seeing others cycle through the crap makes you feel better about cycling through it yourself and A) we're so lucky to have girlfriends and B) dating sucks.

2. I think it's pretty universally accepted that using a speaker phone in an open area is a dick move, right?

SO THEN WHY DO SO MANY PEOPLE DO IT!?!?!?!

3. I was singing the praises of this fast drying top coat the other day and I thought I'd take a moment to tell the internet:

Poshe' is fantastic and really does dry with LIGHTENING SPEED.

4. I didn't really get around to wrapping up 2010 and laying out my plans for 2011 but here's the jist:

A. 2010 was a rocky road, but I learned a lot of things about being a human.

B. 2011 is going to be MY year.

C. I will continue my (undocumented) 2010 resolution to not eat at Weinerschnitzel anymore. I totally rocked that one and didn't touch it AT ALL, despite The Schnitz being one of my favorites. As it turns out, I really CAN live a life without pastrami pretzel dogs!

For 2011 I will add "I will not eat at Burger King anymore." Another favorite.

D. I failed at my resolution to achieve my drivers license weight in 2010. BUT, considering the way 2010 unfolded, I'm pretty stoked that I have maintained my weight. So for 2011, I'm targeting that drivers license weight again.

E. I failed at my resolution to read a measley 12 books in 2010. I got to like 10 1/2 but I really need to buckle down on that because if I'd spent less time laying in bed playing Bejeweled Blitz or Bookworm, I'd have read those 12 books AND THEN SOME. So 2011...a book a month. For reals this time.

F. I didn't pay off that one credit card either. But I did reduce it by half.

So that's it. No Weinerschnitzel, no Burger King, lose 40 pounds, read more books.

5. I have to attend a team FENCING activity tonight. And it was my idea, so when I end up strapped into a too-small straightjacket'y looking thing with a strap up the crotch, I won't have anyone to blame but myself.

PLEASE GOD, DON'T LET THE FENCING OUTFITS BE MARKED S, M, L, XL, XXL!!!!!!!!!