Monday, May 31, 2010
Giant Forehead Photo of the Day
Also: This is the necklace that I saw on the lady walking down the
street that made me break and sign up with Stella & Dot.
I look shiny because I thought I wad going to spray tan later so I
didn't put on any makeup except they're closed so instead of being pre-
spray tan, I'm just shiny for no good reason.
Sunday, May 30, 2010
The HOA paid a designer to select peach and red? I don't get it. Peach
would have been expected, red would have been fun -- but both? It's
like they were trying to satisfy the 80 year olds and the 30 year olds
with one design scheme.
They redid the lobby! This is very convenient because I'm showing the
apt today and it smells new and fresh. I'm pretty sure they re-did
the hallways too, which will also contribute to my ability to get
someone in ASAP.
Saturday, May 29, 2010
Friday, May 28, 2010
Internet, The Private Lives of Pippa Lee was a crowd pleaser 'round these parts.
2. I would like everyone to know I own multiple pairs of these jeans:
And that this necklace is from my new HUGE order of Stella & Dot samples:
3. I had grand plans to leave at 3 today but at 2:50 something came up and now it's 3:46 and GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. No car wash for me today.
Thursday, May 27, 2010
1. THEY'RE IN PALM SPRINGS, YOU GUYS!
Way to rub it in.
2. I'm disappointed in myself for never even thinking about the Starbucks iced beverage cups as cocktail vehicles. My posse and I have slummed it with the Big Gulp cups ONCE OR TWICE and we've certainly attended a parade or two with some spiked hot coffees, but lemonade opens up a whole new world of public intoxication possibilities!!
ENOUGH WITH THIS CRAPPY WEATHER, ALREADY!
It's raining outside my office.
It's snowing at Tahoe.
WHAT THE HECK?
I'm stuck in a transitional seasonal wardrobe, which makes me nuts. Meaning, it's spring but it's too cold for my springy wardrobe.
Like for example, I've worn nearly this exact outfit like 100 times:
The bling is new though!
That's the Boca necklace linked in with the La Coco necklace.
The weekend is supposed to be nice, THANK GOODNESS.
Here, Internet...let me share my very strenuous weekend plans with you:
1. Get a pedicure.
2. Get a car wash (it STILL has criminal cooties in it from when it was broken into).
1. Get a spa treatment that involves a salt scrub, a mud wrap and a facial while I'm waiting for the mud wrap to do its thing.
2. Take my sweet time at the spa, preferably with as much time under an iced peppermint lavender washcloth as possible.
3. See Sex and the City 2.
4. Attend my friend Leslie's MBA graduation party. I wouldn't miss this for multiple reasons, including:
A. I've missed or otherwise flaked on almost every other party Leslie has had. If I was the type of person who broke out in hives, parties would make me break out in hives.
B. Her school was in SF and she had class one weekend a month so on the one weekend a month that she was in school, she slept on my couch. My couch and I are very proud of her.
C. Also, Leslie's house is SO FREAKING COOL and she has a balcony the size of my entire apartment in SF and she has all this awesome furniture out there and I'm always telling her that her balcony was BORN for me to come over to sit on it and drink wine. So I am.
1. Show my apartment to three very friendly-sounding people who responded to my ad.
2. Probably also try to knock something off the list of 100 things to eat in SF while I'm up there.
3. Ooh! And go to that place in my old hood that has the most ass-kickin'est chai lattes.
Unrelated to any of this:
My gum fell out of my mouth earlier (my dad would say I should close my mouth when I'm thinking) and I can't find it. I'm sure it's stuck to my butt or something.
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
Lemongrass ice wrap? SIGN ME UP.
They just called me to see what time I'd be arriving and to make sure I knew I could give them a grocery list so I didn't have to leave the resort if I didn't want to.
Yep. They're very organized.
79 days and counting.
And for the record, I told her I'd be arriving at 4 or 5, which probably means I should see how long it'll take me to drive from San Jose to Desert Hot Springs.
Answer: About 8 hours, assuming I detour around LA.
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Have you missed this sweater?
Also: Riiiight when I decide to not go to Palm Springs because I'd
rather invest my money in my bling business and besides, my tenant is
moving and I need to show my apt, guess who calls? The hotel I'd been
waitlisted for. And I had to decline. And my heart hurt.
Mark my words though: I'M GOING SOMETIME THIS SUMMER.
Monday, May 24, 2010
2. I went out for too many margaritas with a coworker on Friday night and this is extra exciting because it was the first happy hour with a coworker I've had since I started at this company NINETEEN MONTHS AGO.
I can't figure out if it's this group, this company, or just my own "I am old and I need to go to the gym, eat my WW-friendly dinner and watch TV before I go to bed at a reasonable hour" mindset that has developed over the last few years.
I like being organized and prepared and on track and all these things, but I need to remember that because I am organized and prepared and on track, it's okay to do things after work sometimes. I am not 75.
3. After margaritas I came home and prepped a few of the multiple recipes I was working on for my surprisingly fun and successful Stella & Dot launch party.
4. Then I got up BRIGHT AND EARLY so I could be extra prepared and ready and not rushed for the party the next day.
5. And then we partied and accessorized and I came very close to reaching the "no way will I ever sell that much at my own party" goal. Mike did most of the work though:
6. And then I took twelve seconds to relax before re-accessorizing and heading out for Kathy's birthday dinner where I, for the first time ever, sent my meal back. It was the most disappointing Chinese chicken salad ever in the history of the world so I traded it in for the same chicken Christa had and was raving about.
7. Then I got up BRIGHT AND EARLY on Sunday morning so I could be beautiful and accessorized for an S&D training session about an hour away. It was informative and encouraging and OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I'M GOING TO ROCK THIS!
8. AND THEN I went to Target to get some business supplies AND THEN I went home and sat on my couch and organized my S&D world. AND THEN I put seven million dollars worth of jewelry samples in my cart because I have a bunch of trunk shows coming up (!!!!) and I want to be READY! I'll be pulling that trigger this afternoon.
9. AND THEN I watched the NY Housewives (OMG the crazy was crazier than normal) and Lost (OMG WHAT HAPPENED? I STILL DON'T GET IT!) AND THEN...finally...after the busiest weekend I've had in I don't even know how long, I went to bed.
10. And now it's Monday morning.
Friday, May 21, 2010
I posted something to FB about the first episode I watched because WHOA, I was identifying with Christina like crazy. You want the man you love to do something that he is being stubborn about even though the correct decision is SO CLEAR to you? You have to stop telling him what you want him to do and start telling him how you feel and let him make his own damn decision.
Carpenter jeans, anyone?
(Or also that one other thing that is a significant contributor to my OMG GET ME TO THE DESERT SO I CAN GO ON MY SILENT JOURNEY RIGHT NOW drama.)
I told FB that I was relating to an episode of Grey's Anatomy but then I realized that oh crap -- I'm like five episodes behind -- what if in last week's episode someone announced a weird fetish or there something horrible and unflattering that I wouldn't want people to think I was referring to??
So I clarified:
I'm relating to this episode of Grey's Anatomy. It's an old episode though so if someone became a hooker or started abusing prescription medication in the most recent episode, that's not what I'm relating to.
But then an episode or two later (they blur) there was a really fat guy who had a nasty infection between his folds of fat that he didn't know about because he was SO FAT and SHIIIT! I didn't want people to think THAT'S what I was relating to so I re-clarified:
Still catching up on Grey's Anatomy. I'd like to clarify my previous status update: I'm not relating to the really fat guy with the infection under his belly flap either.
AND THEN there was ANOTHER episode that hit home -- the old people who fell in love as youngins but married other people, lived separate lives and then ran into each other at the hospital like 50 years later. He was like "OMG MOVE IN WITH ME!" and she was like "Sorry dude, it's soooo nice to see you but I had to get over you when you married that other lady...my family is here...I can't move to the east coast with you" and I was like "HOW SAD BUT OMG I FEEL YOU, GIRL!"
The good news is that last night's episode (the season finale, I think?) didn't have anything to do with my life. But Mom, if a dead patient's husband goes on a shooting spree at your hospital and starts killing people so he can get back at Patrick Dempsey, PLEASE BE SURE to tell him that you're a nurse and not a doctor because then he won't kill you.
My next post will be about things that have happened in MY life...not on TV.
Thursday, May 20, 2010
And OH YES I DID pop that collar.
Today was also the first "I like your necklace" comment from this chick at work who is like my grown up attire guru. I wasn't trying to be all "OMG STELLA & DOT!" but she kept asking me where I got it because she said it looked familiar so I broke down and asked her if she'd been to a S&D party recently and WHADDAYA KNOW -- SHE HAD!
In other news, I'm feeling better (it's amazing was a full night's sleep will do for a girl) but I still really want to go to that spa in Palm Springs for Memorial Day weekend. DAGNABBIT though because I waited too long and now they're all booked. I called and asked to be put on the waitlist in case they had any cancellations so FINGERS CROSSED!
If that doesn't work out, Carrie offered to let me camp in her back yard. She also offered to "respect [my] silent journey." We discussed that, unfortunately, her cat Tiger has ZERO respect for silent journeys. He'd for sure be out there talking my ear off the whole time I was trying to regain my inner peace.
So anyway. Better sleep = better mood, better outlook. Imagine that.
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
But right now, Internet? I've never wanted to go sit by a quiet pool in 100 degree heat as much as I do now.
Alternatively, I'm going to make a big neon sign that says LEAVE! ME! ALONE! and wear it until I feel like talking to people again.
I was looking for places to escape to and I found this hippie place somewhere or other that would give you a badge to wear that said something like "I am on a silent journey" or whatever but it was supposed to indicate that you weren't being rude to your fellow retreaters...you were just there to not talk.
And seriously, I found myself thinking that sounded awesome.
I neeeeeeeeeeeeed something to restore my peace and confidence and roll-with-it attitude.
2. Speaking of, my car was broken into last night.
Except I must not have locked the doors (sometimes I don't) because THANKFULLY, no glass was broken. I did have a box of dresses to mail back to wherever I bought them from (which I intended to do yesterday at lunch but I got distracted) and they took the dresses but left the box on my neighbor's front lawn. I figure the couple hundred bucks of lost dresses but the no-broken-glass are a wash...with the added bonus of not actually having to deal with the hassle of the broken glass.
So whatever. It's my fault. I shouldn't have left an empty Rubbermaid bin in the back seat over night. I can deal with it.
The other silver lining is that I've been meaning to get my car detailed but I've been dragging my feet. I'm glad the bad guy cooties are all over my already dirty car instead of a virgin clean car and this is now an excellent reason to GO DO THAT ALREADY.
So I don't care about the dresses. I am more annoyed that they stole my phone charger and mp3 jack cord thing and my (dirty, sweaty running) ear buds because now I have to go to the damn Apple store...and even MORE annoyed that they stole the directions to my grandmother's grave.
I had a ziploc bag with the directions, a tire pressure gauge and my St Christopher medal (Walkera, the one you gave me 100 years ago!) -- all holdouts from my last car's center console but since I don't have a center console anymore, I had these things bagged up and in the sunglass holder thing. Why bother taking any of that?
The directions are just a little map from the cemetary office where the lady highlighted the route to the grave and it's not a HUGE BIG DEAL or anything because they're easily replaced, but that's the thing that chaps my hide the most.
3. So yeah...that plus all the rest of blah blah blah I've had on my mind = I NEED TO GO SIT BY A POOL IN THE DESERT AND SWEAT IT OUT!
4. On the other hand, I have my first Stella & Dot trunk show booked!! And my "launch party" is this weekend!! And my nephew continues to be the most wonderful thing EVER!! And I've been KICKING ASS AND TAKING NAMES with Weight Watchers these days!!
And I'm lucky in a million ways.
(But a weekend in the desert would still make me feel good.)
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
Monday, May 17, 2010
I was over at my parents' house earlier this evening and I was showing them what I got for Kenny [to put in a care package I sent to him while he was in Iraq]. My brother walked in and sat down and said:
BEN: Did you get Kenny any sanitary napkins?
(we all turned and looked at him trying to figure out if we really just heard him ask if we were sending Kenny pads)
ME: Um. No.
MOM: Why would Kenny want sanitary napkins?
BEN: You know, to wash his hands with.
And then even after we told him what sanitary napkins were I don't think he believed us. So later on in the conversation when he started using the words "lube" and "Lubriderm" interchangeably, I had to question him on that too...I can't have my brother going through life thinking that when someone says "lube", they mean hand cream.
And omg mojitos!
Made with mint fresh from their garden!
We even had lettuce wraps (and tri-tip and ribs because why not??) made with that butter lettuce!
Somewhere between mojitos and lettuce wraps was the tour. And ohhhhhhh, what a tour it was. The owner of this house let her CHILDREN make the decor choices, thus the wide and vast sea of green granite in the kitchen (with matching walls) and OMG AN OCTOPUS BATHROOM!
There were tentacles on the walls facing and behind the toilet and they disappeared somewhere behind the shower curtain. It was kinda cool though and I am supportive of doing something crazy with the bathroom because WHY NOT?
I'm less enthused by the penis and vagina she painted on her son's bedroom wall:
It was a very ornate mural based on a picture her son drew and involved a boat and a diver and A PENIS AND A VAGINA.
It's certainly a conversation piece though and now sweet baby Grady gets to sleep under the sea of love!
After dinner we retired to the (normally painted) dining room for a couple rounds of Mexican Train:
I had no idea such a game existed, but whaddaya know? It does! I'm not really sure what makes it a Mexican train versus just a regular, non-culturally specific one but okay, whatever. We were playing with an actual Mexican and she was down with it, so why spend too much time on debating a more politically correct name?
And then when we were finished riding the Mexican train, Walkera and I cruised back down to the 408 and I somehow agreed to join her for Bikram yoga this week, which will more than likely kill me.
Ergo, I went to Livermore and now I might die.
Saturday, May 15, 2010
Friday, May 14, 2010
I don't feeeeeel as dull as this outfit looks. I bought these earrings 100 years ago -- from somewhere exotic that I HATE that I can't remember -- but I've only worn them a couple of times and you can't see them at all in that picture so HERE:
Crow's feet! YAY!
(Or is it crows' feet? Or crows feet? I'm too lazy to Google but I'm sure you're judging me alot anyway.)
The big pisser today is that the Diet Dr Pepper machine was FINALLY restocked with DDP (seriously, only two rows of DDP and SIX of Diet Pepsi? Even though the Diet Pepsi NEVER runs out because EW!) so I fed my $.65 into the machine and it only registered that I'd inserted $.35 and it wouldn't give me any of my coins back so I walked my ass back to my desk to get $.30 MORE and when I got back -- like 60 seconds later -- my $.35 credit was GONE GONE GONE and my $.30 got me NOWHERE.
In other news, I crashed a Stella & Dot party last night and have determined that I need MORE MORE MORE samples! There were a bunch of things that I didn't look twice at on the site but when I saw them in real life, had to be added to my I NEEEEEED THAT list. Luckily, as a newbie, I have the chance to get a bunch of free stuff in my first 100 days so I've gotta get crackin' so I can BRING ON THE BLING.
Bonus: I met a chick at the trunk show who had just sold her first book and she got me ALL FIRED UP to sit down and make that same thing happen for myself. I'm excited about the possibility, anyway.
I've been thinking about the jewelry and the books and how A WEEK AGO I was getting excited about the office DDP machine being restocked (wait...that was today...but you know what I mean) and now I'm excited about making things happen for myself that are actually INTERESTING.
I LOVE LOVE LOVE the people I work with and I do actually, for the most part, like my job (DON'T GET THE WRONG IDEA, UNIVERSE!), but this has been a rough week and I can't help but daydream about other stuff. I used to wish I was a nail polish salesperson because that sounded like something I could talk about with authority. Maybe jewelry is the new nail polish?!!?
Or maybe all the new Pampered Chef or Creative Memories people get just as excited and in six months I'll be looking back and feeling foolish?
Thursday, May 13, 2010
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
But shoot, it was $250 and A) I have NO BUSINESS buying a $250 necklace and B) well, that's pretty much it. I just shouldn't be spending money on that kind of stuff.
EVEN IF my current wall-o-necklaces has been leaving me cold lately.
I found something similar-ish at Anthropologie for the LOW LOW PRICE of $60 so I bought it to try to talk myself out of the Stella & Dot necklace (Anthropologie shoppers will laugh that Anthropologie was the *value* option in this scenario) but it broke almost immediately and it was scratchy and just generally not as pretty as the one I actually wanted so I returned it.
Another friend of mine had just signed up to be a Stella & Dot "stylist" and talking to her about it made me think that maybe I could do it too, but be super passive about the whole thing. I absolutely could not stomach the whole hitting-my-friends-and-family-up-to-host-Tupperware-parties thing but I figured I'd get the stylist sample price on the necklace I was dying for (and okay maybe a few others) and if a few web sales came my way, great.
So I talked to Gemma about it all and while I was SUPER tempted, I decided that no, I'd continue to resist the necklace and just try to get more life out of the jewelry I already have.
BUT THEN, when Lauren and I were on our "three hour tour" on Saturday we sat on the patio of a restaurant in downtown Livermore and I just raaaaaaaandomly opened my trap and complemented a lady walking by on her necklace. She stopped and told me that she got it from one of those Tupperware party things, but for jewelry.
STELLA & DOT?
DAGNABBIT, THE NECKLACES WERE FOLLOWING ME.
And then, because we were still sitting there when the lady and her husband walked by again like an hour later, he poked my arm and told me that I needed a new necklace too.
I KNOW, SIR! STOP TRYING TO SPEND MY MONEY!
So a couple days later I emailed Gemma again and clickty click, the deal was done.
My initial motivation was one necklace that callllllllllled to me and I didn't care about making my money back but shoot...the more I look through the Stella & Dot stuff, the more excited I am about earning MORE MORE MORE!
But even a kickass necklace couldn't make me force Tupperware parties on my friends.
Except then I realized that I've been invited to 100 Tupperware or similar parties so not everyone thinks they're as shameful as I seem to so I'm going to get over myself and actually try to do a "trunk show" or two. I'm not at all opposed to doing them, I just don't want to go looking for one to do. If they fall in my lap, then great.
So here's my finely tuned plan to increase the quality of my overall jewelry collection:
Step One: Stop calling them Tupperware parties. (Pending)
Step Two: Come out of the closet. (CHECK!)
Step Three: Passively say "Hey local internet! Want to host a Tupperwa...um...trunk show?" (CHECK!)
Step Four: Make enough money to keep myself well accessorized for eternity. (Pending)
We'll see how it goes. For now I'm just excited to get my hands on the bling. And since I haven't *actually* read the terms and conditions or the getting started guide yet, I'm not sure if I'm allowed to do this (my guess is no) but for the click-adverse, here's the necklace that started it all:
But okay, the first one is better than the pictures of me from the last couple of races so whatever:
AND THEN I MADE THE MISTAKE OF CONTINUING TO CLICK and found this bright gem:
But now I know why the wrinkle between my eyes has gotten more pronounced lately:
Vision of beauty.
Monday, May 10, 2010
It was a WEEK.
I'm glad it's over, I'm glad I have things to be glad about, I'm glad to have NEW! SECRET! EXCITING! things to look forward to too.
Not *my* secret exciting things to blab about, but secret exciting things nonetheless.
2. But speaking of last week, it started out with Christa listening to me cry about my own drama and it ended with me listening to Christa cry about her drama. I thought my crap was pretty big, but she totally kicked my ass in the shitty things to cry about department. The good news is that both of our dramas have settled down and I don't mean to be all "Bad things that I don't really want to talk about were going on last week" but my point here is that it is SO SO SO SO wonderful to have a posse who will drop everything and circle the wagons when necessary.
We've only really had to circle one time before but the state-wide swiftness of the "OMG I'LL PUT ON A BRA AND BE RIGHT THERE" was impressive.
We spent the tail end of last week on red alert but I'm very glad to report that by Saturday night I was mooning Christa and Jeff in the BART parking lot and 90 minutes later I was getting hugs from and discussing dinosaurs with Allison and Iggy's tiny daughters.
3. About Saturday night: I feel like Lauren and I should adopt the whole "three hour tour" part of the Gilligan's Island theme as our own theme song. It was not the first simple, straightforward afternoon we've spent together that turned out to be neither simple nor straightforward, but did end up being 10 times more entertaining than originally intended.
The lesson here is twofold:
A. Never think "I'm gonna hold it until we get to Christa's house" because you might have been given the wrong key and end up being unsuccessful in all attempts to break in.
B. Roll with the punches and it'll all be okay.
4. In other news:
a. I did confirm that Saturday's 5k time was THREE MINUTES faster than the last 5k I ran back in November. I cooled it with the running after that November race because I was starting to not enjoy myself so I went back to the drawing board and started the Couch to 5k training program. My goal was to gradually ramp back up to running the distances I had already achieved, hopefully increasing my speed as I went.
So the three minute thing makes me think it worked! I'm THRILLED THRILLED THRILLED that I'm running about a 13:30 average mile, but even better than that, when I passed the one mile mark I was only at 12:30, which is a full two minutes faster than the 14:30 mile I ran the very first time I ever ran a whole mile without stopping.
That first time I thought I was going to DIE but that 12:30 wasn't even a push.
Inspirational artwork at the elementary school where the race started and ended:
b. My wonderful, perfect nephew's uncle on his mother's side is one of those musical genius types and can play an instrument just by picking it up and trying. He's a beautiful piano player too and it appears that Baby has the same genes:
The clapping is new. My heavy breathing and annoying voice are not new.
Saturday, May 8, 2010
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