Christmas

So Christmas was 100 years ago already, I know, but I can't NOT report out on these very important things:

1. Santa brought me a life-size Mike Rowe cutout for Christmas:



I'm pretty sure that when Mike Rowe found out that these were going to be sold, he had restraining orders taken out against everyone who bought one, but REALLY MIKE ROWE, I PROMISE, MY LOVE IS PURE, I SWEAR!

Mike Rowe came to Christmas dinner and had to wear a hat, just like everyone else:

And now Mike Rowe lives in my bedroom (WHERE HE BELONGS!) and most likely scared the shit out of the cleaning ladies the other day:



2. I baked things for Christmas that were prettier than they tasted:

Cherry Tassies from Better Homes & Gardens Magazine

Chocolate-Hazelnut Thumbprints from Cooking Light

Except for these, which KICKED ASS:



Smoked Cheddar Stuffed Mushrooms from Cooking Light but I nixed most of the filler, doubled the amount of cheese and used garlic jack instead of smoked cheddar, so they're not very true to the recipe.

3. There was a disturbing trend in outdoor holiday decor this year.

The trend?

TACKY AS ALL HELL.

Most houses looked like they just piled as much mis-matching, tacky, blow up and/or animatronic CRAP onto their lawns as they could find, plugged it all in and called it a day. There was almost NO eye for coordination or taste and it made my eyes bleed on a nightly basis.

The two exceptions in my 'hood include this lovely modern-ish display against the existing tropical landscape:

And this orderly and ultra-traditional house:

Everyone else was a mess, including my own house, where all the flashing lights made it appear like we were running a whore house.

And yes, I said "whore house" in my post about Chrismas.