Things

1. Lauren and I were out and about after last night's Shark's game and had a grand ol' time with a couple of Canadian Indian gentlemen...as in, ethnically Indian, but from Canada.

There was this other dude who was W-E-I-R-D and who kept telling me that his parents were really rich and then trying to kiss my cheek and who got weirder as the night went on. I told him a bunch of times that I thought he should just go home because he was pretty drunk but he wouldn't leave me alone.

A while later I had my back turned to him and was engaged in our conversation circle with the Canadians and I heard the weird guy make a negative comment about Filipinos, which was SUPER random because who sits in a bar by himself, gets drunk and talks shit about random ethnic groups?

Actually, plenty of people, I'm sure. But there weren't any Filipinos around us so I don't really know where it came from.

But, Internet, you know (or do you know? I dunno) that my darling, perfect nephew is Filipino and whatever it was the weird dude said about Filipinos was like he was insulting my darling, perfect nephew and THIS IS NOT ALLOWED. But shoot...I was in a bar and the dude was drunk and I wasn't trying to educate him on how America is a melting pot so I just told him that dude, my sister in law and my nephew are Filipino so shut the hell up and really, I think you should go home now.

And then back to my conversation circle.

A short while later he said something to one of our Canadian homies that I didn't quite catch but that indicated his displeasure that we were ignoring him in favor of our Canadian friends. This was unacceptable to me and I could tell that the Canadians felt awkward about it so I told him FOR REALS, I THINK IT'S TIME FOR YOU TO GO, at which point the bartender came around and escorted him out.

Asshole: EJECTED!

The Canadians were like I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU JUST DID THAT! And I was like Dudes, I hate to say it, but I think he was being a dick because you're Indian. And they were like HE WAS FOR SURE BEING A DICK BECAUSE WE'RE INDIAN. And I was like THAT IS EMBARRASSING. HE SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF HIMSELF. And they were like WHITE GIRLS DON'T USUALLY GET WHITE DUDES KICKED OUT OF BARS BECAUSE THEY'RE BEING DICKS TO INDIAN DUDES.

It wasn't a big production and there was no yelling or anything...I just was not going to allow that guy to make my new friends feel uncomfortable. Plus, the shit he was talking about my wonderful nephew's people got me all fired up.

2. Speaking of my perfect, Filipino nephew...we had lunch together and I showed him my new work badge. For whatever reason he did NOT like the picture and kept looking at it disapprovingly. I didn't get a video of his more dramatic responses, but this is still plenty cute (despite my annoying cackle in the middle) so I'm posting it anyway.



3a. Example #495839092 of how the internet has taught me that I'm not alone:

I posted something to Facebook about how naming my brothers as my life insurance beneficiaries (which I've done a few times in the last year) is a rough reminder that I am single single single and I was surprised to get comments indicating that other single ladies feel the same way.

3b. Sort of related: My brother Ben was shocked that when he married my SIL Who Does Not Wear John Deere Pajamas, she expected him to make her the beneficiary of his life insurance riches. I like to tease her for being a scheming gold digger because she somehow finagled my parents into giving her authority over their estate (sort of) but sheesh Benny...no duh your wife should be your beneficiary!

4. I now have eight Dailey Method classes under my belt and I'm starting to feel the results. So much of my awesome buffness will be hidden underneath the fat, but my ability to hold the plank position for more than 20 seconds surprised me the other day.

ATTENTION LESLIE: I'm scheduled to go to the 6AM classes on Tues and Friday of this week but if you have Veteran's Day off you should join me for the 830 class on Thursday!