I see pictures like this one from a wine tasting trip last summer, where I'm not in a particularly flattering position (hello thigh spread!), and I'm surprised that while I'm definitely the fat one, I don't look like Jabba the Hut compared the others, but in my head this is an optical illusion and that in real life I *am* Jabba-esque:
There are pictures that confirm my Jabba theory (like one my mother took on Christmas that was from a sitting-down-and-looking-up-at-me angle and where I was holding a tiny little five week old baby -- a prescription for an unflattering photo), but there are ten times as many where I look way better than I do in my head...yet I believe the Jabba ones are true and all the others are just flukes.
There's no talking me out of it, but that's what's in my head.
Jabba the Hut with an ass of steel, of course. That's part of me I know is true.
But I'm still happy to have pictures like this one because I look happy to be with women I enjoy and admire, which is also true.
And the other thing that is stupid is that one of these ladies has expressed similar thoughts about herself and it blows my mind because I look at her and see a strong, healthy, successful, funny woman and I totally don't get it...except then again, I totally do because the same could all be said of me, but I see it all so differently.
Maybe 2013 is the year I fix all that. Or maybe it'll be 2014. Or never.
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